A Wedding Story....

A hot Saturday in August... Must be time for another wedding! Forget the Wedding Crashers, I sometimes think that if there is a world record for wedding attendance, I would be a prime contender. Why? Not because I have an addiction to wedding cake (although I have tasted some great ones), but because I have a side job as a D.J., and summer time in the D.J. industry means weddings, weddings and more weddings.

Working as a DJ is not something new to me.. I have actually been doing it since age 12 when the local elementary school needed someone to DJ roller skating parties and my Mom was the school's music teacher and volunteered me. That turned into a high school business, then to college radio stations, then to a local company here in Oregon where we were the main DJ's for all the OSU and U of O Fraternity and Sorority parties (nights that I would love to erase from my memory banks! Yikes). Finally I broke out on my own and have been running my own side business for 8 years.

So, Saturday was yet another wedding... but why I am I blogging about this wedding? Because I just had to laugh at the fact that it seems that in all instances in life, there are two sides to every story.. two points of view. One event can be seen completely differently depending on what side you are one. Here are the two points of view I saw this weekend.

First, there was the point of view of the bride and the groom and the wedding guests. To them, they attended a wedding. At the wedding, there was a DJ who acted very professionally, he had a nice sound system, he was clear in his announcements, he played lots of great music that kept the guests dancing late into the evening.. pretty much a no problem type of night as far as the music went.

Now, there's my perspective... Very different from everyone else! First, the unload... I am a DJ... I have a lot of VERY heavy sound gear. When I arrived at the wedding, which I had been told ahead of time was outside, I soon discovered that when they said outside, they meant up the side of a friggin mountain. So there I am in the parking lot, looking up the side of the mountain I am about to climb multiple times, lugging heavy speakers, subwoofers, amp cases, etc. Needless to say, by the time I got all that stuff unloaded and set up, I was a sweaty wreck. I had just enough time to get myself to a point where I LOOKED non sweaty and changed into my dress clothes, before guests arrived, wondering who that sweaty freak was standing behind the speakers.

The ceremony went fine, and soon all the guests headed up to dinner. That's when a potentially huge problem hit. Out of the blue, while standing there, queuing up the next song, I felt a "snap" on my waist, and my pants suddenly loosen. I looked down only to realize that the snap on my tuxedo pants had broken... off... Suddenly a wave of panic set in... these were my pants.. my tux pants... and tux pants have no belt loops. Then came the frustration.. "What?! Why are my pants breaking.. I am training for a marathon.. I have actually LOST quite a bit of weight.. not gaining.. why in the world are my pants breaking?!" But that didn't solve the problem.. bottom line was that at any point in time, my zipper, the one thing holding my pants in place, could slip putting me instantly in my skivvies in front of a large wedding audience.

Soon, the wedding coordinator came to check in and make sure I was doing alright. She asked if I would like some food, to which I replied "sure!" A few minutes later she came down and brought me a giant plate of pulled pork with barbecue sauce... mmmmmmm! I quickly dove in. Unfortunately, that big old plate of meat also brought out something else hungry... lots and lots of bees. Suddenly they were everywhere. And that brought on a huge challenge.. to stand there... queue up music, look professional, act as if there is nothing wrong, meanwhile swatting off dozens of bees fighting me for my dinner without getting stung. I soon wolfed down what I could and then frisbee'd my plate away, taking the bees along with it. Whew...

It didn't take long however to realize that hills, pants and bees not withstanding, I had much bigger problems brewing... problems that I had never had to deal with in all my years as a DJ. Now, keep in mind.. I am performing so to speak.. I am picking songs, one after another in an order that I feel the group will connect with. I can't ever venture too far from my table. I can't up and leave for periods of time. Also remember that I am outside, on the side of a hill.. somewhat away from the rest of the world, yet surrounded by people. And while that pulled pork was a wonderful thing to my taste buds... boy howdy.. my tummy just didn't agree with having it there. There really is nothing like knowing that you can't leave a place and that you are constantly being watched and evaluated, while feeling your stomach churn and gurgle inside. Now, I have no clue how this happened, but I quickly grabbed my bag, riffled through it and out of some freak miracle of nature... found 2 Peptos inside it. Luckily.. they saved the day and again, from everyone else's perspective nothing out of the ordinary was happening to the DJ.

By the time I had gotten to my last great challenge of the evening.. moths.. everywhere.. swarming my head... thanks to two large lit globes serving as decorations just above my head, I was beginning to think that I was facing the plaques of Moses.

So this is why when the evening was said and done, I had to laugh to myself about how differently things look to different people. To the bride and the groom, the DJ was professional and did a good job. To me, it was one oddball issue after another. Now, don't get me wrong, it turned out to be a very lovely wedding... great people.. great atmosphere.. no one called the cops on me for cranking tunes at 20,000 decibels over the hills of South Eugene.. but boy did it have some interesting times for me!

Oh, and by the way... in case you are wondering... my pants zipper did eventually give out on me.. just as I had finished lugging all that stuff down the hill, and was just getting into the van to drive home.. I think someone was watching out for me!!!