Birthday Mayhem

Birthdays this week! Woo-Hoo! Time to be my evil self! It just so happens that this week, 2 of my employees are having birthdays. Now, some people think that birthdays are a time to honor and celebrate others. Nope. Not me. Birthdays are a time to show people you care by going overboard in driving them nuts.

Think about it.. What did you get for your birthday last year? What did you do? Was it just an average birthday, doing typical birthday things? People get into the typical "birthday mode" making every birthday just like the last, and to me, that is just boring. Now imagine this: you come to work only to find every last inch of your desk wrapped in aluminum foil. When this occurs you come to realize that:

A. someone went to a whole heck of a lot of work just for you, and
B. You will remember this for a long time.

I guarantee that 10 years down the road when you celebrate another traditional birthday, you will think back and say "Man, remember that year when all my stuff was encased in foil..." So birthdays are a time to really get people in obnoxious ways that both honor them and annoy them... That's my job.. I'm BIRTHDAY MAN!

Now, I'm not used to having 2 birthday stunts to pull off in a week, so this year was particularly challenging, without breaking the bank. Plus, a year ago, we enacted the "glitter truce" in the office. I had been a big fan of using glitter in my decorating in years past. It so annoyed my co-workers that for my birthday last year.. they dropped the "glitter nuke": bags and BAGS of glitter.... everywhere.. and I do mean everywhere.. in my office. I was literally buried in the stuff and it took me the better part of a work day to shovel out. Heck, I still find pockets of glitter on a daily basis, over a year later. So we all decided the glitter fun was over, and now I had to find a different way to make a mess.

So... Birthday #1.. the "inexpensive" solution, this time for Brian. The idea was: when he went to lunch to cover every last inch of his desk, drawers, computer, floor, walls, ceiling, etc. with post it notes. All I had to do was go to Wal-mart and get the big pack for $5 and then go to town. You'd be amazed how far those things can go! It's was also amazing to see the look on his face when he returned from lunch to find his office in a sea of yellow. Just priceless. Now, in judging my own work, I realized I grossly underestimated the amount of post-its I would need, so the floor, walls and ceiling had to go without..... but still... good fun.

Four days later, its time for birthday #2.. one of my weirder attempts. This one is for Aaron. Just to give you some background, Aaron is the office angry liberal, constantly going off on his political rants that can be quite entertaining. I may not agree with him, but it is fun to hear him get worked up. He is single.. no plans or interest in marriage.. and kids are the last thing from his mind. So what better way to celebrate his birthday.. then with a Baby Shower. I mean, come on, you get birthdays every dang year, but when was the last time he had a baby shower'? I can dare to say... never..

And so there I was at the office, extremely early hanging pastel colored streamers, wrapping his desk in baby wrapping paper, giving his area a generous sprinkling of Baby Powder (for the scent), and covering his desk with diapers, teddy bears, little shoes, diaper genie refills, bottles, etc. (Thanks to Molly who recently had twins!). To top it all off, a giant "It's a Boy" foil balloon, stuck to his desk. Now, Aaron typically takes things in stride, but I think he was a little speechless for once when he saw his office. And that means.. I have done my job!

Now I get to sit back and take a break from birthdays while mentally plotting and scheming for next year. hmmmmmmm. Just the brainstorming I love to do! So Happy Birthday Brian and Aaron.. please don't kill me.